the following podcast contains adult themes, sexual content and strong language. Basically all the good stuff. Jamie, why are we here?

We're here because my dad's in a porno that's written. Report erotic literature.

Previously on my dad wrote a porno.

I also want to personally thank Sir James Godwin for letting us have this opportunity to raise much needed money for our local charity. The masses and donkey is trust. The safe word is FIM Bull.

It

stops you from getting pricked. She's have vagina, vagina,

vagina. Review of a gin and tonic.

Hello, James and Alice. How are you

guys get wonderful. Thank

you. Excellent. And hello, everyone at home. People who are crashing their cars being interrupted in the supermarket from laughing too much spitting the TL dangerous. Listen, Todo has yeah take care out there, Guys. My dad read Porno is causing carnage. The world Are we liable if someone does hurt themselves? Absolutely No. Okay, we take no responsibility for injuries caused, But if you do operate heavy machinery for your job quit. Pull out the headphones now Stop. Thank you for joining us again. We are here to tackle chapter nine of Belinda blinked

Can you believe it? I feel like it's been a lifetime. How's that? Only been that many chapters? Well,

I thought about something the other day. Oh, yeah. In book terms, in narrative terms, we've actually only known Belinda for three

days, but I feel like I've known her a lifetime. I can't imagine my life without exactly

it'll never be the same again. Your life

will s o the previous chapter waas the Tom Bhola on this chapter. Is

the shell a shallow? Yeah.

What? I think I shall A's. I think of those, like arcs know those things on the beach like the sheds on the beach. I think that's a beach hut. Technically, I believe I'm right in thinking that center post does have shall a so I

don't have the log cabins. I think Charlotte is what you get in, like course. Shovel. I

think it reflects from very different backgrounds. Yeah, Mother used to call it a shallow get sound puncture going down to the garden shed, James, the shall. I Did James go to the mansion?

That's a been mother. Rocky recently built a garden shed at the bottom of his garden and they called it the pavilion. Really? Upside anything. You really

can't. Is that where

he writes in the pavilion? Yeah, I think he does. A bit like rolled on. Yeah. Yeah. Has something in the back of the garden to get out of her. So Chapter nine is the shall A Are we ready? My heart racing Right now.

You have got very strange wrapping my legs. I think I've got sweaty. Huh?

Anticipation? Good goodness. Okay, so Belinda blinked. Chapter nine, the shall a Belinda felt the horse box reversing, accompanied with the grinding of gears. And then the engine of the four by four went dead. There was a silence for at least 30 minutes,

30 minutes. She was sat in the back

of the horse box of the minutes. Well, copious amounts of Jenna Tonic James, who wouldn't stay there.

That's true, but I would put my head on. But is everything all right? That's the daily mail story, because you know, when people leave their dogs in the car when they're in the supermarket for, like, two hours in the summer, you crack a window really

bad. There was silence for at least 30 minutes, and Belinda started to feel abandoned. Well, she would, of course anymore. Then suddenly the tailgate opened on the duchess climbed up the ramp. She was dressed in full horse riding gear. A red jacket, white George burns, black boots. Get very Jilly Cooper, isn't it? Isn't here Black jumping her and crop with a scarlet tag on the end.

To me, that says, like, Fox Hunt. Rather in general, horse riding like the

red? Yeah, certainly doesn't say sexy time. Belinda blinked. Stop, Did she? What a surprise. Fearing the worst was a fearful blink. The duchess grabbed Belinda's ass and pulled her up to a standing

position. Fire her ass. Not the ass that she's been raising money for the tabbouleh,

not the donkey. And that's his

trust. Okay, Sorry. I thought that was an ass in the horse box with the right. Okay. Could you think about the mechanics of pulling someone up by their ass? Get around the difficult? That is quite

tricky. Duchess is strong. She then pushed her down the ramp and pulled her by her left tit

intothe summary push and pull going on one of the tits on the road to me to you Yeah, What's going on? So ass and hold her hand. They're designed perfectly for such an action.

Irregular in by

the nipple. I love it when he says tit in the singular, wonderful tit, because

Rocky is a bit of a tit. It's quite fun. Word to say the duchess made for a doorway at the end of the lounge, which led to a large wet room, a wet room

like it with a shower in the now probably not a portent. I think it's

like the leather room. She stood Belinda under the shower and turned it on. Slowly. The duchess started to strip off.

Her riding girl seems a lot off after getting all that writing here just to take it off minutes later. So did you spend 1/2 an hour getting into the riding

gear? Is that what you think? She's just taken off Like Belinda, the duchess was well endowed.

Does the Duchess have a day? Yeah, I

think he means endowed, as in breast it.

Yeah, I don't want

it going on double tits squared, but Linda, in the touches

a pomegranate salad waiting to happen. I love

that the public ran. It's just will

never die. I will never look at one of the same way again. And I also feel really terrible that I said that they don't hang. They do hang, but they do have moves like tit. They do hang like thio.

Like Belinda. The Duchess was well endowed, but her ass was showing signs of a 50 something years.

50 something years of war. I'm waiting. There

was someone dragon in my family. Pickle, saggy arse. But harass was showing signs of a 50 something years and childbirth had not been kind.

Oh, my goodness. Give her a break in the fifties blessing. So, like when you're 50 Had it for like I don't know what it should be that sake. Now I just don't feel like it shows the 50 years on it. Like I do think Is that the rings on a tree trunk particularly you could age someone just by the ass like 52. Next about her thong would be straight.

However, she was still in good shape and the riding clothes had made the most of her attributes. Belinda could not help but hope she would not be in worse shape when she reached the same age while Viet some 20 years away. I hoped that she helped. Belinda could not help but hope she would not be in worse shape when she reached the same age, albeit some 20 years

away. It's that compliment. She couldn't help. So she she was hoping that she wouldn't be in worse shape. So she's really looks quite good. So she hopes, like, Yeah, the her or better.

Yes. Okay, cool. You're welcome. I'm glad we got that shit. Christ. Now totally naked. The doctor started to wash Belinda and herself down with shampoo and smelly natural oils.

Smelly, So shampoo, like all everybody smelly know that such a bad thing to say. You got some Christmas smelling good use,

but in the whispered a word of thanks for this thoughtful act. Even though the Duchess his hands were all over her vagina and breasts a word of thanks. So Theo Duchess immediately frowned and stepped out of the shower area to pick up her crop, which was laid close to hand across the wash hand basin.

Oh, anxious. We know what's gonna happen without crop. I don't

address me as my lady and nothing else. And to emphasize this, she flipped the crop onto the cheek of Belinda's right hats. By

the way, the duchess is a dick and Belinda to what is going

on. Oh, Belinda's Roy ass, which the crops impact made Belinda jump and left a nasty bright red mark on her skin's stinging blender, grimaced and replied quickly. Thank you, my lady. That's better, Servant said. The duchess is a bit kinky now. This tentative isn't she s and M territory. This chapter feels quite different. I mean, I'll say one thing for Rocky, you never know which direction it's gonna go. It changes like the wind from Chapter two chapter. You could be in a maze getting kind of tied up. You can be had a leather hearing town hall clock. You could just be in a regional sales meeting. I mean, no rhyme

or reason to think. Eight chapters ago, we're in a job interview and busy all week, isn't she? She was gonna do a big shot, wasn't she? But she went instead to the tennis. Today should be a big shock. Actually, she did

the duchess set the crop aside and continue to wash Belinda down

one little flick on the right ass and then back to Washington. Well, I think she was just kind of setting the tone, saying, You know, address

me correctly, getting out the parameters of sexual bad knowledge about to take place.

Don't say never say what it's about. Attack, Attack! Come with me, Haven't you? Would about now Have you been borrowing Rockies? One of the data like father like son guilty.

The duchess set the crop aside and continue to wash down Belinda again, applying plenty of hand squeeze into a tits

applying and she expecting it to dispense soap nipples.

After five minutes of this, the duchess changed her tactics and concentrates. Don't have vaginal and clitoral a different tactic. Belinda's Nichols started to respond. She was, after all, that type of girl and couldn't help it. However, the doctor started to smile and said, That's very good servant. Thank you, my lady, replied Belinda, with her nipples now fully extended

and have a think Paris go with

the nipples, now fully extended on her vagina, started to become wet. The duchess decided to drive down Belinda, a mover to her bedroom. Belinda was told to lie down, open her legs wide and masturbate herself in front of the Duchess. Masturbate yourself.

Is that the phrase?

Masturbate yourself, I guess. Just masturbate.

Yeah, I just feel really uncomfortable.

He isn't your dad.

Why? Well, quite how you You're right.

Masturbates one Those words that you don't really associate your parents, you know, knowing Yeah, open her legs wide and masturbate herself in front of the duchess.

Can you stop saying masturbate

yourself in front of the duchess, please? I'd love to, Alice, but it's down in the book. My lady, please fuck me as you wish. I know I am your servant, So please use me for your pleasure. Sepp Elinda.

Is that the most words Belinda's ever said in a row? I think it

is. Why not string a sentence together? Maybe she likes being a subordinate.

I don't know. Oh, she's a power player. Is Belinda Shall we, you know, mentally checking in in the extra leg

room C or something mentally updating your facebook status.

It's complicated. With Dutch feeling a subservient.

They don't just smiled and said Yes, servant. I do believe you mean it, and I will test you soon. Don't you worry. What does

that mean? I hate the Duchess. She's really creepy.

Yeah, she doesn't seem to be enjoying it that much. Isn't really embracing the role, playing like a fun way. She's quite, you know, quite austere,

isn't she? Has been no conversation so far. It's all been command after command. If they're in it for the chit chat.

The Duchess left the room and Belinda looked around her. It was a classic motel bedroom. There was nothing to look at, which would give her a clue as to where she waas. Okay,

So where are we?

Well, she has no clue where she is.

Please listen to Bill and Melinda. Blink. My thing is, what room ever tells you where you are? That's a photo of a map of where you are on

the wall. She would just have to wait until the Duchess wanted to have sex with her and perhaps tell her where she waas

in the order A finished here in Cambridge. Does she get more information? It's time they do it three times. Just off the a 50 to the

duchess soon returned with two glasses of gin and tonic in her hands.

No, no more of this business. Oh,

yeah, She set them down and started to massage Belinda's

long legs. Set them down. Where are you supposed to do that? That flat Barca, Zane's and things sexy movies. It

was 30 years ago, because I was just

I don't know what those tights you think you are. 60 Dania.

She stretched them out and quickly shackled her ankles to the bottom of the bed with a similar pair of handcuffs Tony had used on her that afternoon in the Maze. Red ones. Then Yeah, this time they were colored. Yellow

Way. Didn't tell us where the gin and tonics got put. Will tell us. Uncle of the handcuffs.

This time they were colored yellow. Belinda wondered, ideally, where they were purchasing them from toys. I was.

They go. There's another. That's another like thought she shouldn't be having in that moment. I wonder why she's gonna handcuffs a

child's toy story.

Oh, she said, No, that's Oh, God, yeah, there's millions. Says he was not talking about over a special offer on handcuffs. Strief of £10 right yellow and green colors while stocks last. Oh gosh, yeah, why does she never feel like she's

in the moment. Always a mind is wondering. The Dutch just started to massage Bill in his arms, moved on for the legs. It felt so good and she half expected them to be tied to the bed head. But this didn't happen. It

felt, I mean, Hans massaged. I won't tell you how the massaging of the arms makes me think of like physiotherapy rather than something. Yeah, exactly.

Yeah, she's obviously got tennis

elbow. Oh, sure, right. They dio tennis elbow fire, explains shin splints. That's why she was working

down there to ass is just quite

a woman. I mean, no massage.

The duchess started to massage Belinda's arms. It felt so good and she half expected them to be tied to the bed head. But this didn't happen on Belinda soon found out why they finished their

drinks. Elated packet because they have some war. The Macarena. The

duchess, who was also still totally naked, started to massage Belinda's body with her tongue.

I told that lick, take charge with tongue. Tom must be freaking strong. A deep tissue massage. Let me work out those knots. Warrior of her body looks 50 but a tongue is so lithe and muscly, it looks like a an 18 year

old. The duchess's breasts, draped over

like a tablecloth, just sound really fried eggs on draped sounds like they've been placed. So, like she's like, You know, when you, like, walked out. Do they got

the duchess's breasts draped over Belinda's body as she

licked her from head to toe like a thin veil of saggy skin. Belinda was cold, so she breaks the number like a burrito.

Belinda found it strangely erotic, especially when the duchess's nipples, now as hard as rivets, scraped

off. Well, I'll say for it again. Oh, spot everyone. I'm so sorry. Rivet. Yeah, so she's got these, like napkins abreast with, like, boat suddenly end. What did they Drake. There's so much Wait, wait our bags of skin. So how is a rivet scraping your rotting? It must be what it was like looking you from head to toe.

I mean, I'll touch you, Duchess scratching, scraping, scraping that tongue, though, that so that rough cats tone licked sandpaper. She's gonna have grazes spinning the war's

Berlin really has. So Belinda found it strangely erotic, especially the duchess's nipples. Now as hard as rivets scraped her soft skin. That is strange. Belinda responded by rubbing her hand up and down the duchess's vagina and eventually picked up enough courage to massage her clit.

Here's the thing about this. Do we have to finish the book? I think we've heard everything. We're ever gonna hear it. So what happened? That's the

thing. We think that we've

heard everything. And then yet

each chapter he manages to dredge and nowhere, just the most eye watering imagery. It's just it's just unbelievable. So we have to keep on reading

way. Isn't credit where credit's due? Yeah, and there's no credit, you hear

after some very satisfactory moments,

rave reviews there There's Offset again. That's what I think. After every Belinda blinked was very satisfactory moments

after some very satisfactory moments, according to the loud moans emanating from the Duchess, she stood up and left the room.

Excuse yourself,

no even but then decided to wonder what she'd done wrong. But the duchess returned with her riding crop in hand. The duchess smile that Belinda and said, Are you ready for this servant now? Belinda nodded her head slowly in disbelief. The duchess wasted no more time and pressed the crop handle into Belinda's vagina. Oh, she had read about this type of sexual fantasy, but had never, ever experienced

it as she read the letter. Blink because I've never read about this

some sales job. This was

turning out understatement. Off this century,

Belinda jumped.

She happy would Jesus. What was that?

She didn't blink us pose, However. She grinned and said, Thanks, my lady. She also wickedly, through heart. I must send Jim Sterling one of

your stupid, great comedies.

Belinda started to grind on the leather crop handle.

Oh, God, Jamie.

In actual real life experiences, the handle was smaller than a lot of the cock she had encountered.

Oh, sure, anecdotal evidence there.

The duchess held it in position on Let Belinda enjoy the experience while she sucked her breasts. And eight, Who's eating?

Whose leaving? Everything. The touches is thinking a buffet. And it is this chowing down? Yeah, the duck chess is all over Belinda. Okay,

eight. She sucked her breasts and

ate her nipples. She didn't.

Belinda became very wet orgasm in at least three times in quick succession. Satisfied? The duchess looked over to the wardrobe. I brought out a strap on Penis again made a finest leather, its finest leather.

To be fair, what does it matter what doesn't have one of those? You know what it says, Riel leather. You know, unlike Italian wallets,

she put it on and entered Belinda in a single thrust

through

this time, Belinda knew that she was in for a real hammering. It was truly the best right she'd ever experienced since the Dutchman Pieter

rails. Oh, yeah, she did have quite a time with the Dutchman. I know we're not having a good time, but at least Belinda's things. The worst ride of my life.

The duchess that unlocked Belinda's ankles from the plastic shackles and expertly flipped her onto a front,

using her breasts like you would a sheep.

She started to massage Belinda's back and buttocks for four of them. Well, after a fairly short time, the doctor said to Belinda, Okay, servant is your turn. Belinda couldn't believe what she was hearing and watched warily watched the duchess removed the straps on, put the Penis onto Belinda. The duchess made sure everything was tight and in the right place and slapped. Belinda's asked as a gesture of good to go

way you'd tap the boot of a taxi to say, Dr

I Know I love that it was all, like, shackled,

correct. It was almost like Belinda's about your parachute job like a roller coaster, health and safety. She's not on the oblivion.

Belinda walked around the bedroom with her monster prick

out in front of a break, walked about what it's like. Suddenly

her gait has shifted to quite the masculine strapped monster prick. There's a phrase I didn't think I'd hear. She could hardly believe it and happily got to work on the duchess after about seven minutes of pounding the deputies vagina and cervix,

China's fine well, obviously,

Belinda Raster to get on her knees.

It's a classic

combo. In fairness, Belinda thought the old bird was not doing too badly. The old bird God, what a way with words. She have okay, thought blender. It's time for a couple of volcanic orgasms. It's time for a couple of volcanic orgasms, and she entered her mistress's vagina again.

It out like a flipping dormouse. That is that the first I don't think it is told. Mouth. How about from now vagina like a door mouth. Sure, that's a saying in and out of a vagina, like enough of a child in vagina, in and out of anywhere like a vagina

bazaar. But under kept up the stimulation. And soon the Duchess had orgasms. Four times. She Sam erred. Thank you, servant. That was utterly fantastic.

Hey, you're done. Just trying to give a

character guy. Belinda came out of her hand, but under came out of her and looked at the duchess's face. She looked totally shut.

But of course you shouted world shattering. The Duchess probably looks a bit like I look right now. Yes, completely haggard.

She looked totally shattered, Her makeup was ruined and her immaculate hair was all over the place. But Linda then held it, hits hard in her hands what, like a stretch school, rolled them up

more like crumpled paper

and pulled her into an upright

position. Why's everybody using the breasts as handles or three?

Duchess flocked back onto the bed. No stamina for Belinda, then to Belinda Surprise. Her mistress immediately fell asleep

immediately like narcolepsy. Blender

had obviously water out and suddenly thought,

What do I do now? Leave.

She was free to leave Africa? Or was she? Belinda thought for a few moments on an idea. Rented her head 1st 1 of the whole

book, right? I could do my job and then we'll have to shut everyone inside.

I think it's just nice. For once, something metaphorically entered her. Oh, very nice. But Linda thought for a few moments on an idea. Entered her head. She took the discarded yellow handcuffs and put them on the duchess's ankles. Could go.

Good girl. It's getting a bit like revenge. E.

Yeah, like an actual story. Something's

happening. There's a plot.

The duchess didn't stir throughout this procedure and was now sleeping very deeply. Perfect thought, Belinda. She should stay this way for at least four or five hours, which will take you past my 12. Our servant contract.

I told you she had the

second part of lenders. Plan was simple, as she had arrived at the Shall. A totally naked. She had no clothing. I needed something to get back to the horse and jockey for her late evening appointment with Peter Rouse.

She's still gonna make the appointment. Is a professional Alice? Of course she is.

Calmly, Belinda went to the wet room and picked up the duchess's discarded riding the hose boots. I knew it. They would fit her just fine. And you didn't need to wear the underwear.

She very rarely wears underwear. It's

an alien concept. A blender. She quickly pulled on the job. Person riding, boots standing up. She looked at herself in the large mirror. No bird, she thought. Indeed, they look very sexy. Believe it. Give it a break for a minute.

Hazel,

she thinks about is Sex. One track mind.

Let me guess. She's probably looking a bit dishevelled. She's not gonna be looking a bastard.

She not bad. She fought indeed, look very sexy. The black boots suited her coloring on the elastic ated Jumpers perfectly fit her two passes. The black boots suited her coloring on the elastic ated jobbers took the shape of her perfect ass extremely well, Perfect in the beholder. She pulled on the white blouse and attached the Black Crow vat around the collar.

We don't need to put the crib on. I just need to get back to the horse and jockey. Don't accessorize the flourishes that you put in a fascinator and she was on her way back to town. Is she playing out?

Leslie? She put on the red riding jacket. It indeed of the beauty and must have cost a small fortune. A last look in the mirror, tobel under what she already instinctively

knew. What do you What do you think she thinks Gone. I think she's saying I look heart or something like that. Right? Thing about her looking good for her age.

Okay, A last look in the mirror. Tell Belinda what she already instinctively knew. She looked a $1,000,000.

She did not look a little equestrian. Range 12

99 She checked on the now snoring duchess

went back to check. Just leave. Debts is like that is totally check. Oh, I love that She checked

all the now snoring Duchess, grab the black riding cap and crop switched off the lights and left the shall A as she had hoped, the duchess had left the keys in the ignition. Belinda had no need for the horse box, so she unhooked it. And mentally thanks One of her past male flings for teaching her how to caravan. She jumped into the driving seat, started up the engine, put on the headlights and headed for the main road. All she needed now was a sign post for local town, where she could orient herself, find the horse and jockey and keep her appointment with Peter. And that's the end of Chapter nine.

Have you ever read a book that is both so grueling on dhe and so rewarding in equal measure? No, I don't think that I've never left as hard at traps in the book, but the same time I've never left quite so exhausted is draining, especially have ta

go round for tea round with my dad's house and just try not to think about what you've just read.

So what's the next tactical?

So the next chapter is called The Horse and Jockey.

So we're back in the pub, so she makes it back.

She makes it that spoiler alert. So if we haven't a united all of you listening, come back next week for Maur Smutty Fund with Chapter 10 which is seems incredible to have got this far. In the meantime, please do get in touch with us. Let us know what you think. We love your thoughts. Dad loves your thoughts as well. We've been checking to

it so you can tweet us

at Dad. Wrote a porno. Yeah, you can go on Facebook as well. My dad wrote a porno the

page there. And we have an instrument to my dad wrote. Because instagram a bit funny about these things. They potentially were like Chapter nine.

But before then, interrogated Chapter 10. Enjoy yourself. Look after yourself. Masturbate yourself.