Caspar Babypants. Raising kids and finding yourself.
Geek At Sea

Chris always knew that he wanted to make music, and the type of music that matched his personality. He didn't want to maybe put on a costume for anybody. Although his rise to fame was with The Presidents of the United States of America, that was not what he truly wanted to create. A little voice inside Chris's head was telling him to keep looking.

After he broke up the Presidents, he tried all sorts of different things and then finally settled on music for kids. The destination was this simple, innocent music for kids and their parents.

Caspar was Chri's nickname while performing with Mark Sandman and a band called Morphine in the 1990s. Chris was living in Boston, and when it got really cold outside, he needed a hat, except he had no money for one. Instead, Chris found a pair of wool baby pants in a clothing exchange and it fit perfectly on his head! The kids in his neighborhood started to call him Babypants.

When The Presidents ended and Christ started to sing for the kids, he put Caspar and Babypants together and became Caspar Babypants.

Caspar wants his music to be playful and stress-free for parents and to help them share a moment of ridiculousness and joy with their kid. When he composes, he aims at parents as his primary audience.

Chris knew that The Presidents was not the gig he wanted, the the allure of TMV and cheering fans was pulling him in. As a result, quitting the band in '97 was a very messy and emotional experience.

By the time the band retired a second time however, Chris was at peace with what he really wanted from life and ending PUSA was a neutral, education, and self-aware experience.

As a couple, you want to get to a point where you are neutralized and are no longer making an emotional decision. If you come to a rational agreement, you can remain friends and be a functional family for your children.

Stick to the facts and explain that although mom and dad are no longer loving each other in a way they need to stay together, they will always be there as parents, and will always be there for the kids. See if your kids have any questions, be loving, and assume them you still love them.

Caspar says both. Marry Lynn, Chris's first wife, was the one who wrote "Run baby run" to keep their kid occupied and happy in the car. Kate, the second wife, has inspired Chris to keep creating with her artwork.

Ask yourself - How do you feel? Do you feel relaxed around this person? Do you feel like you can be yourself? Do you feel like you can say whatever you want to say? Then you are in a good place.

On the other hand, if you feel yourself editing yourself or reserving your opinion or tiptoeing around to please that person, those are indications that you're not in the right relationship.

Starting anything is easy, but once you start, there is going to be a lot of work required to achieve any kind of success. Once you realize what kind of work is required, you have to make a decision on whether you are willing to go through with it. If the answer is no, then it's a good time to quit.

It's a myth that winners never quit. Instead, winners quit a lot and quite often. You have to allow yourself to quit.

Chris recommends that you read a book by Seth Godin called The Dip for more information on the topic of quitting.

Everyone has problems, and whatever you end up doing, it's never just smooth sailing.

If you can find what you love doing though, the problems that surround it will be good problems, and you will not my dealing with theam.

Chris suggest reading A Subtle Art of Not Giving a F.

Not a single thing.

Caspar Babypants is very proud of the fact that there's no educational value in his music. You'll never learn how to count to 10 or do the alphabet or tie your shoe or brush your teeth or any of that stuff. Nothing.

Chris deliberately picked 0 to 6 year olds as his audience because they live in a magical world, in a world without excessive vocabulary and organization. It's a crazy, surreal, energetic place, and he simply takes part in it.

Caspar Babypants records music in his home, and burns his songs on the old-school CDs, costing a grand total of $4 to product an entire album.

He is making more money as a one-man show, playing for parents and their kids, than he did while being the lead singer of The Presidents of the United States of America.

The car. The car is great because you have their attention, but you are not looking at each other.

Say what you want to say, use plain language, just get to the point.

You can also play a podcast on the subject, ask for their opinion, and then use that as an easy way to lead into the conversation.

Chris compares it to the similar chemical reaction to when a person falls in love. When you become a dad, you have to be less selfish and invest more time in family activities.

If you have strong feelings toward your profession or you are feel external pressure to have kids but you are not sure, don't do it.

In case when a mom is a primary parent that is responsible for kids and a dad is the one making an income, the dad could be seen as the "fun" parent, one that shows up and does whatever he wants. This attitude from a dad can create friction in the family. The primary caregiver, a mom in this case, would have implemented a system that keeps the family running, and the dad should be aware of and respectful of the system.

Also, a dad should should show kids emotional depth, both as a parent, and as a male character.

Read the book, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk, by Elaine Mazlish and Adele Faber. It’s a parenting book about language and empathy.

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