Smash Notes
Mike Folden. Business, life and adventure with a newborn.
We are joined here by Mike Folden and his son River. Mike is a filmmaker, photographer, and now a dad. Mike and his wife Priya are avid explorers of the great outdoors. When their baby boy was born, instead of changing their lifestyle, they bought a camper van and headed to the wild. If you think that baby life means sitting at home, Mike and Priya are…
People
Notes
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Time is definitely less. All personal fun projects have to be put on a back burner so that family and work can take priority for a little while. It helps to put any priority tasks on a calendar, to at least keep yourself organized and focused.
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Time is less. You have to start to prioritize and add things on a calendar. Sometimes you can't finish all you want, and the best you can do is chip away at it one bit at a time.
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Mike Folden told Geek at Sea that a job, a side business, and a newborn left one slot for the gym: before sunrise. He wakes at 5:00 or 5:30, trains before his wife and the baby are up, and then goes to work. Evening jiu-jitsu no longer fits. He is home around 6, the baby is down around 6:30, and a 6:30 class would erase weeknights with his son. He also will not keep one routine. He rotates the gym, jiu-jitsu until an injury, yoga, and kettlebells. He had not planned to be a father. He and his wife had been together 13 years and married almost three, delayed because he was unsure about children.
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Life changes in all kinds of ways, but whether you are ready or not, you have to keep going.
As a kid-free couple Mike and Priya had all the time on their hands, and ability to make decisions on the fly. But after their son was born, some of that mobility went away.
Financially having a child was a big change. They went from 2 people and 2 incomes, to 3 people 1 income.
Of course, now every choices they take in life will also influence their child.
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Listen to Mike talk about their experience. Instead of being stuck in a city, they got into a camper and drove out to the sea. Their child was only a few weeks old. It worked out for the best.
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I definitely have never loved anything as much as I love my son.
I knew I was obviously gonna love my son, but I wept when he was born, I mean, I dropped because I just couldn't. That was just an amazing, amazing experience. I think the biggest revelation is that it's a constantly moving target.
When you have a kid, you could be doing everything right and he's still just not gonna sleep right, or you did everything right and he still just doesn't want to feed ...etc.
I think that's a really good just practice for life.
You can do all the things right in life, you can wake up early, you can work out and eat healthy, but you still might get cancer. You just never know.
~ Mike Folden.
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Support each other as much as you can and have fun with everything. Remember to look forward to time with your baby.
You have to realize that raising a kid is incredibly insanely hard, but you have to keep living your life. Push through it.
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School is becoming a lot less important, and people are now figuring out how to live a lifestyle, rather than how to get a job.
For example, younger generation is being way more creative. Everyone has a camera, everyone can make a movie, everyone can make a song...etc. People who never even knew they could be creative are being creative, and they are making money from it.
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Mike Folden told Geek at Sea that diaper changes became a game once he sang through them. The songs take on a country twang, and no two are the same. He thinks the shelf of children's music is short: Raffi, from Toronto, who has been at it about 40 years, and Seattle's Caspar Babypants, whose show the family had already seen. A new act could win by being catchy rather than polished, because small children want songs about their own day. For expectant parents he recommended the birth class. Theirs was three Saturdays, five hours each, and it made the couple compare expectations months before they could argue about a procedure in the hospital.
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Do the baby the birthing classes, where you get to learn everything that happens during birth.
Discuss with your partner what you both want out of the birthing experience; better do it before you are right in it.
Say "yes" to help when it is being offered, but also ask your friends and family to leave you alone; you just had a baby, that's totally okay.
Don't buy a ton of baby things. You don't actually need it.
Take Google with a grain of salt. Children are unique and other people's opinions may not apply to you. If you have a medical question, call your nurse. There are medical hotlines you can reach out to.
Plan your future vacations and put it on a calendar before you have a baby. This way you are committed.
Related notes
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- How Does Your Life Change When You Become a Dad
- Why Does Greg Isenberg Say Creative Work Still Needs People?
- How Can I Support My Partner and My Marriage While Raising Children
- What Is Some Valuable Insight for First-time Parents
- What Are Some Learning Experiences Regarding Parenting
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