#12 — Diana Chapman — Coaching Towards Consciousness
Below the Line with James Beshara
Diana Chapman is a best-selling author — her book “the 15 commitments of conscious leadership” is one of my all-time favorites — She is also an advisor and executive coach who has worked with over 1,000 organizational leaders, as well as a founding partner of Concious Leadership Group.
Her incredibly powerful book has a great subtitle — “A new paradigm for sustainable success”... with the key phrase being sustainable success. Today I get a chance to talk with her about so many different topics, but they almost all lead back to that phrase. Check out this episode to learn more.
In this episode
- 03:09 - What are enneagrams?
- 10:52 - What is each category of the enneagram called?
- 21:20 - To be placed in an enneagram category, is it more of a genetic root or is it developed from childhood experience?
- 27:36 - What’s one similarity between all enneagram types?
- 30:00 - What does the enneagram model show us?
- 42:37 - What’s Diana Chapman’s advice to James Bershara and his wife during a challenging time?
- 50:33 - What is one thing that creates such exhaustion and burnout?
- 01:03:47 - What are the five core feelings and how do they connect?
- 01:09:50 - How can you turn away feelings of discouragement?
- 01:21:28 - Why do some companies fail?
- 01:22:44 - What are three stories that have shaped Diana Chapman?
- 01:32:09 - What’s a big concern of Diana Chapman has that she doesn’t get to talk about a lot?
- 01:38:09 - In 2019, is there a pattern in the enneagram that makes for a better leader?
Smash Notes summary for this episode
What are enneagrams?
The origin of enneagrams are unknown, but they are at least 3,000 years old or older. The models are found in Egyptian tombs and in old sites. It's thought to have come from ancient people studying human beings to know what causes reactivity in a human being. Enneagrams are those seven deadly sins, plus two more.
What is each category of the enneagram called?
There are 9 types. Type 1 is the reformer or perfectionist, type 2 is the helper, type 3 is the achiever, type 4 is the artist or individualist, type 5 is the observer or investigator, type 6 is the questioner or skeptic, type 7 is the enthusiast or adventure, type 8 is the challenger, and type 9 is the mediator or peacemaker. Each one has a snake, or a darker side of its type.
To be placed in an enneagram category, is it more of a genetic root or is it developed from childhood experience?
There isn’t a lot of science behind enneagrams right now, so it’s not known for sure. So far, it seems that a person is more genetically wired to be a specific type. The environment at home may or may not have the reactive shadow patterns showing up, which plays a huge role in a person’s reactivity.
What’s one similarity between all enneagram types?
We all want the connection as humans. Enneagrams tell us what stands between us and connections. Ego in reactivity is an enemy to connection. Ego alone, not necessarily.
What does the enneagram model show us?
It shows that in any given moment, you are above the line— in the state of trust— or below the line, in a state of threat. You are either open, curious, willing to learn or you are defensive and wanting to be right. You’ll see whether life is happening by you when living above the line, or if life is happening to you when you are below it.
What’s Diana Chapman’s advice to James Bershara and his wife during a challenging time?
This can also be applied to everyone, but you should allow both feelings in a state of trust where you can laugh and grieve at the same time. Let emotions and feelings be felt when they need to be during a certain period of time in order to heal.
What is one thing that creates such exhaustion and burnout?
People’s unwillingness and unknowingness to feel their feelings and speak the unspoken words. Withholding thoughts and feelings are exhausting, which creates more of a burnout than the burnout itself.
What are the five core feelings and how do they connect?
Sad, scared, angry, joyful, and sexual are the core feelings. Combined, they make up a bunch of other feelings. Diana and her team want people to know how to be in tune and locate feelings as sensations in the body in order to listen and utilize them toward completion.
How can you turn away feelings of discouragement?
Instead, ask yourself, "How true is this discouragement?” It’s important to constantly get your mind at a neutral state. Say, if you feel as if you are not as qualified, turn your thought around to personally analyze how you are qualified, and not compare with someone else. Then, figure out what you are doing and let your curiosity explore.
Why do some companies fail?
65% of companies fail with cofounders because of the failure to have a relationship between the cofounder and the company. A brilliant idea gets damaged by people wanting to be right, instead of focusing to maintain a healthy relationship.
What are three stories that have shaped Diana Chapman?
Her brother-in-law inspired her by how he was a conscious leader by how he treated people. Another is when her company was sued during the past year. Now, she looks at things as her mirror, and took back control of the things she could. Finally, at 16, she took on the school board when they banned people involved in extracurricular from smoking cigarettes-- and, she won.
What’s a big concern of Diana Chapman has that she doesn’t get to talk about a lot?
The heartbreak of seeing people being disconnected from nature. It's of man wanting to manage and control nature. Instead, Diana wants leaders to have a deeper appreciation to care for nature. She hopes people are more conscientious about the environment and how we are affecting the world.
In 2019, is there a pattern in the enneagram that makes for a better leader?
No, Diana doesn’t not believe so. She thinks all of them are equally valuable, and believes that nobody wins unless everybody wins. What matters is if there are crucial actions that are taken, and if the people are being presently aware and impactful on their peers.