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In business the number one reason people don’t pull their triggers is fear. Everyone has fear of failure, even people who have lots of successes in their businesses. Nobody ever really gets over it. On today’s The Startup Chat we discuss how to move past fear and change your thinking.


Today’s points of our conversation:


Why you need to face fear head on.

What we can learn from young children.

How to cope with social programming.

How to acknowledge, accept, and push on through fear.

How to find the balance of fear and reality.

How to reprogram your thinking.


If you want some resources for how to overcome your fear shoot us an email and we’ll be glad to hook you up!


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As always, you can hit us up on Twitter @Steli or @hnshah, #thestartupchat.


 


Steli: Hey, everyone. This is Steli Efti.


Hiten: And this is Hiten Shah. And on today’s episode we're going to talk about the fear of failure and how to get over it. And I'm going to hand it off to Steli because he really wanted to talk about this, and I think it was based on an experience he had recently.


Steli: Yeah. So yesterday I was speaking at an event. And then at the end of the – it was a Q&A session, an interview session on stage. At the end of it, there were a lot of people that were asking great questions, so I had a lot of fun. And the last question that was asked, that person basically said: hey, Steli thanks for sharing all this stuff, blah, blah, bah. It seems like you have figured out a way to not be afraid of failure anymore. It seems like you had lots of failures and you’ve overcome that. And you’ve preserved through it and now you’re successful.


And it seems like the fear of rejection, the fear of failure is something that you’ve learned to leave behind you, and you’ve kind of grown beyond. How did you do that because I'm still terrified and afraid to fail? And I was so grateful for that question. It was a very honest one. It's an uncomfortable question to ask, especially the way – with the level of honesty that he asked that question. But I was not just happy that he asked about fear of failure, because I think this is such a huge thing, and that I would share some of my experiences and learning there.


But I was glad that he asked in the way that he did because it gave me an opportunity to clarify something. The first thing that I said and responded to is that I am still afraid to fail. And I don't like rejection, and I don’t like failure. And I'm sometimes bummed that I can come across as if I am this person that has gone beyond this, and that I don’t have these emotions. I'm very sensitive to lots of people like us Hiten that have a lot of visibility, and share a lot of our experiences.


Even people – some people I think are full of bullshit, and full of shit, some people are on a spectrum of more or less authentic in how vulnerable, they share what they truly believe. I know that we both try every day to be as honest and as authentic as we can, and I'm trying to get better at this every day. But I think one of the big problems is that people are listening to people like me on stage, and they get this like misconception that I'm not afraid of fear, afraid of failure anymore and I've gone beyond this. So they're like how can I get there as well,

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