The Startup Chat with Steli and Hiten on Smash Notes

The Startup Chat with Steli and Hiten podcast.

December 31, 2019

Unfiltered insights and actionable advice straight from the trenches of startup and business life. The show hosts, Steli Efti and Hiten Shah, are both serial entrepreneurs who have founded multi-million dollar SaaS startups. Being busy CEOs of fast-growing companies, they know the value of your time and make sure you get the most out of each 22 minute episode. Tune in for new episodes every Tuesday and Friday.

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Today on The Startup Chat, Steli and Hiten talk about how to define your identity.

Trying to define who you truly are is one of life’s biggest struggles. Often, when we define ourselves, we tend to focus on the negative aspects of our identity or how we compare to other people around us.

In today’s episode of the show, Steli and Hiten talk about how to define yourself, why Hiten tweet about this topic in the first place, they share some tips that can help you define yourself and much more.

Time Stamped Show Notes:

00:27 About today’s topic

00:37 Why this topic was chosen.

01:26 What made Hiten tweet about this topic in the first place.

02:45 Things that shape your identity.

04:05 Why a lot of our titles are mostly just labels.

04:45 How to define yourself.

05:50 A core part of Steli’s identity.

06:53 How Hiten defines his identity.

08:15 How social media makes defining your identity much more difficult.

3 Key Points:

Don’t try to find yourself, just define your self.

There are certain parts of who I am and how I live my life that are core to me.

The core part of my identity is that I am somebody that loves to teach.



Steli Efti: Hey everybody this is Steli Efti.


Hiten Shah: And this is Hiten Shah. And today on the Startup Chat we're going to talk about how to define your identity. Oh man. Identity, what's that? Who are you? Stel who are you?



Steli Efti: Well, who the fuck are you? That's a good question. It's not easy to answer. I don't know. It depends. It depends on who I'm talking to, right?



Hiten Shah: Oh man, you opened a can of worms.



Steli Efti: Well, you tweeted about this, so it's your fault, right?



Hiten Shah: Crap, I opened a can of worms. And you just opened, you just put another one next to it and said, "Let's open this one too."



Steli Efti: Of course. You tweeted how do you find your identity? And I observed that tweet for a little while and there were all kinds of interesting replies to that. And then I was like, all right, I need to double click on this and we need to go deeper and figure out why did you think about tweeting it? What did you learn from the responses? And what is our answer to this fucking question? Which is obviously a big, can be as big and ambiguous and philosophical as we want it to be or more practical. And I don't know where we're going to go with this. So let's rock and roll, but what made you tweet this in the first place?



Hiten Shah: I like really hard questions. This is a hard question. What defines you? How do you define your identity? Who are you? What are you? And is it defined by the people in your life or is it defined by you and what you feel about yourself? Or is it different in every moment? So who do your kids think you are? A father, right? I mean that's the construct they have.



Steli Efti: Yeah.



Hiten Shah: Right? You're my father, okay. Now, when I think about that, I'm like, "Okay, well how do I identify with my father?" He's my father, but I am his son. And what's the difference between those two? That kind of philosophical question gets really interesting when you think about your relationships and how you're identifying yourself in them and how the other person's identifying you in them. And what dynamic does that create? So that's one aspect of it. Another one is just much simpler, which is who am I and what do I want to be? What do I want to put out in the world? How do I want to carry myself? I mean, all these things shape your identity. Even the most fantastic thing. And I'm going into, I'm basically dropping a bunch of nuggets for you j...

Key points in this episode

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