🌑 Oleksiy Kovyrin. Post-pardum depression in dads, how to spot and what to do about it.
Rad Dad, hosted by Kirill Zubovsky
When Oleksiy’s daughter was first born, he didn’t feel the love for his child. Quite the opposite, he felt that his daughter was a new source of problems. Full of this difficult thoughts and busy at work, he was unable to share them with anyone, even his wife.
In this episode
- 03:14 - Are you supposed to love your child unconditionally from the moment she arrives?
- 01:07 - What does it feel like to have a brand new child?
- 07:29 - What does it feel like to have expectations to meet when in a parental role?
- 15:26 - What is one of the most rewarding things of parenting a young toddler ?
- 18:22 - For people struggling with the realities of becoming a parent, how can they be encouraged?
- 24:14 - What is some valuable insight for first-time parents ?
- 27:04 - Is remote work a good fit for employees who have families ?
Smash Notes summary for this episode
Are you supposed to love your child unconditionally from the moment she arrives?
The conventional wisdom will make you feel like that is the only way, but for some parents it might not be the case. For various reasons a child might cause physical and emotional pain, and it takes time to get over it; years for some. The best thing you can do to get through this faster is to talk with your significant other.
What does it feel like to have a brand new child?
It might feel overwhelming, and depends on your situation, you might find yourself less than excited about the arrival of your child. Thing you enjoy doing in life, life travel or sleep, might get rudely interrupted and put on hold for a long while. It happens to dads and moms everywhere, causing a lot of emotional problems, but this subject is rarely discussed publicly, and even your friend are unlikely to share until you have a child of your own.
What does it feel like to have expectations to meet when in a parental role?
It is difficult when adjusting to someone else taking up your free time. Sometimes a parent's joy in their child's experiences doesn't always mean the parent is having fun.
What is one of the most rewarding things of parenting a young toddler ?
Just talking to your little one, hearing their opinions and feelings, is so interesting to see the human that you are helping develop.
For people struggling with the realities of becoming a parent, how can they be encouraged?
You are not alone. There are others who most likely have similar feelings to you.
What is some valuable insight for first-time parents ?
There is a lot of worry about every single problem. Take the pressure off of yourself and don't worry as much. There is enough stress as is with lack of sleep, disruptions in lifestyle, etc. Just focus on your child, the present moment, and the core responsibilities of helping them thrive.