Smash Notes

Back to #885: How to Simplify Your Life — Tips from Oliver Burkeman, Chip Conley, Elizabeth Gilbert, and More, with Oliver Burkeman & Chip Conley.

Why Is It Harder to Tell the Truth to People You Love?

Elizabeth Gilbert says telling the truth is not simple, and it gets harder the closer and more intimate the relationship. The closer she is involved with somebody, the more stakes there are for her. A paradox sits in the middle of that. The people you love the most should be the people you are able to be the most honest with. They are the people you want to hurt the least, and that is where a no becomes really hard.

She now treats her inbox like her home, because she thinks the inbox is an extension of her home. There are a couple of layers to telling the truth. If somebody walks into her home uninvited, announces themselves, does not say how they got a key, and asks for something, she deletes the email.

Grokipedia·Elizabeth Gilbert

Transcript

#885: How to Simplify Your Life — Tips from Oliver Burkeman, Chip Conley, Elizabeth Gilbert, and More ·

The Tim Ferriss Show

More from this episode

  1. What Happened When Chip Conley Flatlined on Stage?Chip Conley says a speech in St. Louis in his late 40s forced a simpler life.
  2. How Does Chip Conley Separate Knowledge and Wisdom?Chip Conley draws a line between knowledge and wisdom. Knowledge is something you accumulate and add.
  3. What Is the Endowment Effect?Greg McKeown says the endowment effect is a brain habit that makes people value things more because they already have them.
  4. What Does a Stormtrooper Costume Have to Do With Clutter?Greg McKeown says a stormtrooper costume shows the clutter that is not sitting in a closet.
  5. Why Does Keeping a To-do List in Your Head Cost So Much?David Allen says a to-do list kept in your head costs a stack of broken agreements with yourself.
  6. Why Does a Simple No Never Use the Word but?Elizabeth Gilbert says a simple no always begins with thank you, and there is never a but, because the teacher of the nine-day school feels the word but is…
  7. Why Does Simplicity Advice Often Backfire?Oliver Burkeman says simplicity advice often backfires because every system creates overhead.

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