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Back to Adam Grant #4 (on the secrets of strong connections), with Adam Grant.

Why Does a Companion Ritual Mislead Casual Romantic Partners?

People often confuse rituals with the type of relationship in romantic connections. Expressing emotional intimacy counts as a companion ritual because most people only express emotional intimacy to somebody with very strong feelings. When a person comfortable with vulnerability shares emotional intimacy casually, partners assume a serious companion relationship. One of the most heartbreaking experiences involved an ex-girlfriend saying a connection never really got better.

Transcript

Adam Grant #4 (on the secrets of strong connections) ·

Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard

More from this episode

  1. How Does Brian Little Facilitate Connections Between Students?Brian Little facilitates connections by dropping little nuggets to stimulate conversation in class.
  2. How Does Adam Grant Define a Vibe?Adam Grant defines a vibe as the quality of connection between two people.
  3. Why Does Vibing With Too Many People Serve as a Red Flag?Vibing with too many people serves as a red flag for people pleasing and approval seeking.
  4. Why Don't Ideal Traits Predict Speed Dating Matches?Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel have done studies where people fill out a questionnaire before a speed dating event.
  5. How Does Pebbling Help Maintain Relationships Over Distances and Decades?Some penguins collect and present smooth shiny stones to show their suitability as a mate during courting rituals.
  6. How Do You Deal With Ambivalent Relationships?Accept emotions and contain behavior.
  7. Why Does Removing Phones From Schools Improve Outcomes for Students?Randomized controlled and natural experiments show what happens when phones are removed from schools. Boys get bullied less.
  8. Why Does Telling a Female Partner About Personal Insecurities Make Her Think the Man Is a Stud?Men fear that telling a female partner about personal insecurities will reduce attraction.
  9. Why Does Imposter Syndrome Benefit Some Harvard Students?Over half the class or 50 to 60 percent deals with imposter syndrome.

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